Hi everyone,
This week's topic hits close to home for many: the lasting impact of having a narcissistic parent.
Narcissistic parents can be incredibly self-absorbed, constantly needing admiration and often lacking empathy. This can leave their children feeling like they're never good enough, constantly walking on eggshells, and struggling with self-esteem.
Here's what you might have experienced:
The Sting of Criticism
Always being told you're not smart enough, pretty enough, or successful enough.Feeling Invisible
Your emotions and needs rarely seem to matter.Walking on Eggshells
Never knowing what will set your parent off.Twisting Reality
Being gaslighted, where your parent makes you question your own memories and perceptions.
These experiences can lead to:
Depression: Feeling hopeless and worthless.
Anxiety: Living in a constant state of tension and worry.
Low Self-Esteem: Believing the negative things your parent said about you.
Codependency: Prioritizing the needs of others over your own.
How to to manage the effects of a narcissistic parent?
You might find yourself constantly thinking, "I'm never good enough," after years of your parent's criticism. Challenge this by asking yourself: "Is this actually true, or is this just what my parent told me?" Look for evidence that contradicts the negativity. Did you achieve something you're proud of? Did someone else compliment you on that quality?
When anxiety hits, you might resort to unhealthy coping mechanisms like overeating or social isolation. Instead, practice mindfulness exercises like deep breathing or meditation. Take a walk in nature or engage in a creative hobby that brings you joy.Make a list of your strengths and accomplishments, big or small. Did you graduate college? Learn a new skill? Help a friend in need? Celebrate these victories, no matter how seemingly insignificant. Surround yourself with supportive people who genuinely value you and uplift you, not those who tear you down.
If your parent constantly criticizes your life choices, you might need to limit contact or set clear expectations for interactions. This could involve saying "no" to their unreasonable demands, ending phone calls when they turn negative, or even taking a break from the relationship for a while if necessary.
A Message from your Therapist Buddy!
“The negative thoughts you have about yourself are often not true reflections of who you are. They are echoes of your parent's distorted view, not your own reality.”
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