Why Do I Feel So Alone, Even When I'm Surrounded by People?
Ever spend a Friday night scrolling through social media, bombarded with pictures of perfect weekends and overflowing brunch tables, and think, "Why am I feeling lonely?" Yeah, us too.
The truth is, loneliness isn't just about being physically alone. It's that sinking feeling of disconnection, like you're surrounded by people but nobody truly gets you. Maybe you have a bunch of acquaintances, but no one you can have deep, heart-to-heart conversations with. Or perhaps a recent life change like a new job or a breakup left a gap in your social circle.
Feeling lonely doesn't always mean there's something wrong with you!
Here's some advice from your licensed therapist buddy, to help you build genuine connections and feel less alone:
1.Figure Out What You Need :Do you crave long, meaningful chats with a close friend? Are you looking for people to share hobbies with? Knowing what you need helps you find the right connections.
2.Put Yourself Out There: Reconnect with old friends, join a club or group centered around your interests, or volunteer for a cause you care about. Remember, sometimes the hardest part is taking that first step!
3. Focus on Quality Over Quantity: Spend time with people who truly "see" you and make you feel valued. Nurture your existing friendships and deepen those connections.
But loneliness can be a confusing feeling. You might be wondering,
"Is it something I did in the past? Or is this a sign of something bigger?
There are two important points to consider:
Past Experiences Can Cast a Shadow: Sometimes, past experiences like bullying, a loss, or a difficult family life can make us feel guarded and hesitant to connect with others. This can lead to a cycle of loneliness.
Loneliness Can Be a Symptom: Loneliness, while a feeling in itself, can also be a symptom of a larger mental health issue like depression or anxiety. These conditions can make it hard to connect with others, even if you crave those connections.
So, what if my loneliness feels worse, what should I do?
Don't Bottle It Up, Talk It Out
Feeling alone can be a heavy weight to carry. But bottling it up inside won't make it disappear. Talk to someone you trust – a friend who gets you, a supportive family member, or even a therapist. Sharing how you feel can be a huge relief, and they might have some amazing advice or just lend a listening ear.
Is Loneliness Just the Tip of the Iceberg?
Sometimes, loneliness can be a symptom of something bigger going on. If you feel like it's more than just being alone, therapy can help you identify and address any underlying mental health issues that might be contributing to your feelings. Think of it as a detective story where you and your therapist work together to uncover the root cause and build a happier, more connected you.
In the next newsletter, we'll explore practical tips for building meaningful connections and fostering a support system. Stay tuned!
Take care,
Tom Pearse
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