You’re Functioning, But Are You Okay?
If you think you're fine— read this.
Let me guess, you’re functioning.
You wake up, get things done, manage your responsibilities.
And most days, you say you’re okay. You even believe it.
But sometimes, when the noise dies down, a quiet truth slips in:
You feel tired, disconnected, stuck, or like you're just floating through life.
This letter isn’t to convince you to start therapy.
But I do want to share a few things I’ve learned through my clients, and through life itself that might speak to something in you.
⚡ The "Strong Person" Trap
A lot of people who avoid therapy aren’t broken. They’re just strong, self-reliant, and exhausted.
You might not be falling apart—but maybe you’ve been holding everything together for so long that you’ve forgotten what it’s like to not hold your breath.
Some people are great at coping.
What they often realise is:
Coping is not the same as healing.
And emotional endurance isn't peace. It’s just… quiet survival.
🧠 A Few Gentle Disruptions
Things to think about this month:
🔹 Not all silence is calm.
Some silence is emotional shutdown. If you're not reacting, it doesn't always mean you're regulated—it might just mean you're numb.
🔹 "I'm fine" is a survival script.
Where did you learn to always be fine? Who taught you that your needs were too much?
🔹 Self-sufficiency can be trauma in disguise.
The belief that you have to do everything alone usually didn’t come from nowhere. It was learned—and it can be unlearned.
🔹 Therapy doesn’t change who you are—it helps you return to who you were before life convinced you to hide.
🌿 Instead of Advice, Try This
No five-step fix here. Just an invitation:
This week, notice the parts of you that feel tired of performing okay-ness.
Ask yourself gently, “What am I really carrying that no one sees?”
Write it down. Speak it out loud. Whisper it in the dark. Just don’t silence it anymore.
🪴 If You're Curious...
Therapy isn’t magic.
But it is a space where your pain doesn’t have to be edited, explained, or made smaller.
Sometimes, just saying the real thing out loud to someone trained to hold it can shift something deep inside.
If you’re not ready, that’s okay.
But if a part of you is whispering, maybe it’s time I’m here when you are.
With care,
Holland-Pearse Psychotherapy
Practical, effective solutions for your mental health.
Bristol & Online · www.holland-pearse.com
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